The theory of “Happiness Quota”

Amirul once spoke me about his theory of Happiness Quota. He told me, in life we only have a limited chunk of happiness that we’re allowed in a period of time. He theorised that Happiness acts like quota of data, where it starts full and gets lowered as more induced happiness events come around. Like great birthday party – 30%, long streak of good relationship with friends and family – 15% or a bit chunk would be something like marrying the love of your life 90% !

Lately, my happiness quota has reached its lowest ever and it’s taking a while to recharge. Sadness has been my common visitor and has stayed longer than anticipated. Sometimes sadness doesn’t even come with problems, it comes alone and unpacks Aunt Nostalgia, and all the uninvited guests.

So, I’ve made a list on recharging my happiness quota or maybe even it could be a list of  how to cope with sadness around.

  1. Simply, do not do shit you don’t want to do. Be it, seeing certain people or finishing the chicken breast part of rather than the skin of fried chicken.
  2. Leave the things/ people/ situation that makes sadness linger.
  3. Take time for yourself, and all the things you want to do that may charge your happiness. Activities can range from taking a walk, or shopping. A day at the park with ice cream is the perfect charge for my happiness.
  4. Be grateful. Take the time to acknowledge all the blessings and good people in your life.
  5. Don’t keep Sadness locked up at your home, bring sadness out and introduce him to others. Maybe sharing your personal sadness with others can ease the burden. Everyone just wants to be heard.
  6. Charge others’ Happiness Quota – while you do this, yours might charge too.


Here’s a video by one of my favourite youtubers Anna Akana on How to talk to people with depression. 



February diary 

Broga Hill – last minute trip ! Not prepared at all, but found an awesome Uber driver who picked us up at 4.30 AM and willingly guided us through the hill as he called it his playground. It was so risky, trusting an uber driver at such hour. Alhamdulillah it turned out well, he’s even a photographer who shot Malaysia’s Astronaut guy’s wedding. Crazy right? So he took the pictures of us as a group. Thank you Randy!

Monopoly deal – card games were what we played to kill time. Courtesy of Mali. (I still don’t know how to play)

My best friend’s birthday ! Aimin Omar Ali – We celebrated midnight by going to TREC the night before his birthday for the Nottingham’s charity event of Lock and Key (where all the girls get a lock, and boys gets a key and you’re meant to find your match). Pretty cute way to meet if you were single. But oh god the innuendos !!!
Picture of first day of sem 2. S02E01

Mahlstrom gear launch party – I was Amirul’s +1 for this event. The room was filled with tetesterone that night, Mel and I hovered just next to the buffet table eating away nibblets trying not to be awkward. The collection of the sportswear were of great quality, (as I am told by Amirul and Mateen). You can get more info – @mahlstromgear on instagram.

Valentine’s Night – First time celebrating Valentine’s Day with Amirul. And I got to say, never doing it again. Everywhere was packed ! I didn’t know Malaysia took Valentine’s Day so seriously. It was crowded everywhere, but we did manage to get a nice dinner in the end. I got flowers from him, after a long time of me saying I didn’t want any more flowers. And I gave him his favourite donut, a card (YODA BEST) and a luggage tag with a picture of Yoda on it. Since that week he was trying to convince me to watch Star Wars… Atlas now I actually know who Yoda is. Good enough right?

Highrollers – how did I go through a whole sem without half of yall ?


If 2016 was a movie 

(The quote I’m living my 2017 by)

This is probably the time for me to reminisce memories made during 2016, and make new years goal for 2017 right?

It’ll flash to the moment where..

  1. I finished A Levels and got my results
  2. Got Accepted into amazing uni’s but rejected (this should be the downfall/big mistake part of the movie -self conflict)

MONTAGE – Gap Year Activity

  1. Going to Australia alone
  2. Working at CLEO
  3. Lying in bed watching nothing but Sex and The City for MONTHS AND MONTHS routing and crying over Carrie and Big’s love
  4. Using my allowance for nothing else but eat good food and shopping.
  5. Revamping my style/closet
  6. Redecorated my room – painted/bought new furnitures
  7. Brought Ninnah around Malaysia
  8. Started on the 70s Show, New Girl, Elementary, This is Us, Empire.


  1. Went into University of Nottingham
  2. Moved out of home
  3. DIE trying to figure out how to cope with uni
  4. DIE trying to figure out how to live alone
  5. Plagiarism phobia

*Zooms out video of Amirul making me laugh in the car with loud music and wind in my hair* 


BEGIN 2017. 

2017 goals ? Nothing. I’m not setting any new year’s resolution this year. I did fulfill last year’s new year resolution though. I did give more last year and was definitely more generous – i think I’ll keep it as an everyday thing now. Not just for 2016. 

Bid farewell to 2016.





20th Birthday 

I never blogged about my birthday, and I didn’t even realised it ! I’m way late on this post …

My birthday falls on 15th November 1996, thus turning me 20 this year. BIG 2-0. I’ve lived 2 decades on this earth, alhamdulillah. I was dreading this birthday most honestly, the whole “not being a teen thing”. I’ve always feared growing up anyways. But my birthday only gets better and better. I’m so blessed to have spent it with the same people, and also new ones ?

I celebrated early with Amirul on the 14th, had a lovely dinner at Beast. As I sat down, I was dying looking at the menu price HAHAH TOTALLY RUINED THE ELEGANT LOOK I WAS GOING FOR. Pulling faces as I pointed at the prices! 😳😫 It was even a candle lit dinner … like whoa grown ass date. I guess those are the dates I go on now ~ adulthood calling like.

The next morning was my birthday, and I spent it away from home. I was at Uni ! I got a knock on the door at 8 am in the morning. I was so confused, thinking that it’s my neighbour planning to complain about my sneezes the night before or something. But as I opened the door with my eyes closed, “HAPPY BIRTHDAY” they cheered. It was my friends – uni friends !! It was Sophie, Mali, and Nicolle 💕 Such sweethearts woke up early with cake and balloon and presents. Can’t believed they spared money to buy me those things ??? Guys I wouldn’t be able to even buy yall cake. But thank you. It was really sweet.

I went to rugby training to just sit and watch – it was Alina Day okay. I was excused. Ahahah. As I sat there doing my work, the rugby girls came over for their water break and all of them wished me happy birthday. Such sweeetiesssss ❤️

My mom called me and sang the birthday song. I felt like crying 😭 being away from my home. Usually my mom would knock on my door and wake me up singing happy birthday. My sister would break down my door at midnight screaming happy birthday and all. But my family just wished me through the fambam group chat now 😦 It was such a different birthday. Nonetheless, it was amazing. Thank you to everyone who celebrated and wished me.

Adulting begins here ?



Melaka Road Trippin’


Amirul and I have been talking about going on a road trip for ages. But never had the reason to, or even the time. But when my mom suggested on bringing Ninnah to Melaka, she said “Why don’t you go with Amirul ?”  Morning at 10 am Amirul came by to pick us up. He met my mom and got the whole talk on, road safety and all that jazz. Which we both just nodded our heads to. Which then lead to “BYEEEE!” *rushes out the door*

First stop was breakfast! Amirul can’t function without breakfast, he needs his early morning meal. While I believe in the my first meal of the day is always breakfast whatever the time. He bought himself a plate of nasi goreng while, I had some roti bakar. Ninnah just drank teh tarik. I was pretty worried on how them two would get along, but Amirul just knows how to talk to anyone… So it wasn’t hard to leave them two alone. The car ride was just sharing music playlists – constant “Have you heard of this???” I just sat there and listened to them ramble on about Drake, Watsky, and PARTYNEXTDOOR. I barely listen to music, other than the classics, radio and wtv Amirul puts on in the car. Ninnah slept most of the trip, while Amirul and I navigated our way.

At one point the fuel metre  was blinking E and we missed our exit!!! Can you imagine how stressed we were? Missing our exit, on a highway, no near u-turns, no clue where the petrol station was. I was literally holding my breath as we did a massive u-turn, and Ninnah just continued sleeping peacefully Zzzz. The moment we reached the petrol station, I was so relieved. And Ninnah woke up, ” ohh nothing’s up, go back to sleep…”

We reached our first destination in Melaka – Freeport A’famosa outlet! Ninnah wanted to do some shopping, and Amirul has never been. I went in with no intention of spending  any money. But came out with that Orange Nike bag… I need to rethink my life decisions. That purchase left me in a financial crisis. BUT I NEEDED THE SHOES, AND I WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG. Anyways, Ninnah left with some cutesy accessories and staples from Cotton On, and Amirul left with me in his arms crying about being broke. Lucky guy.

Then, we headed on to Jonker Street. The main attraction of Melaka, no? Well at night, but I had a curfew.. so Jonker during the daytime it is ! There were cute small shops with little knickknacks and also, shops with Gap Year Bottoms as Ninnah calls em. Because everyone comes back from a Gap Year with these shorts, and its the Thailand elephant shorts. She bought a few of those. Amirul just followed us into every shop, while he walks his Pokemon eggs and catches all these Pokemons at Jonker. Also took cute pictures with some of the buildings. All that historic stuff..

We also ate at a cute ass cafe at Jonker. Delicious food btw, also reasonable price. The whole interior was so coooooooool. It had the eccentric original (I assume) structure of the building. It had a whole wall decorated  with old chipped plates and at the staircase, they had small vintage sewing machine. Haihh I love cafe interiors like this. Reminded me a bit like Merchant’s Lane Cafe decor.

Ninnah also wanted to go to the beach, because Malaysia = beaches. PEOPLE ASSUME. But all the nice beaches are so far away from KL, so I brought her to Klebang… Lol. It was so dead because it rained. Amirul literally drove slowly by the beach and said “this is it…”. It was grey, and gloomy. It was basically like 8 AM London, beach form. Optimistic Ninnah wanted to wait for the rain to stop, but it never did. Upside to that, I caught myself a Seel !!! ITS SO CUTE.

After all that, we headed home before Amirul got too tired. He slept at 3am the night before.. so yeah. I didn’t want to take the wheel, if I took the wheel we wouldn’t reach home till the next day (that’s just how slow I drive). He’s the sweetest for driving us. It only took us 1hr and a half to get back, wasn’t much of a road trip.  But definitely a start for more adventures! ❤



Pokemon Go, the news of the month. It just recently launched in Malaysia, and the downloads went crazy! I downloaded it after Amirul randomly saying “I GOT CHARMANDER!!!” I was confused what he was saying at first, then I remembered. My sister downloaded in the middle of grocery shopping and caught a Bulbasaur in the frozen food area.  

I made mine and got Charmandar as my first Pokemon. Ever since then, I’ve been putting on my GPS everyday wherever I’m at. Even went out with Amirul for a Pokemon Hunt. 2 times in a week. First was at Sunway Pyramid. That’s where we caught our Pikachu ! I was literally in line ordering for the Hokiado Cheese Tart, and then when I was about to pay a Pikachu popped up on my screen. Amirul literally went all “WEH WEH WEH PIKACHU!!!” And I actually went to the guy at the till and said “Jap jap, pikachu ! Pikachu!” HAHAHAH. Leaving my cousin to pay and take the food as I was trying to catch Pikachu.

We also went to Pavillion and walked all the way to KLCC on the second Pokemon hunt. Yup, the effort. Just that day itself I walked so much that I hatched 3 of my eggs. The mission of that day was for me to find a Snorlax. I even downloaded an app to help me find one – A Pokemon Go Radar. 

I wanted a Snorlax since the beginning, it was when I saw someone left one at the Gym. I WAS AMAZED. I wanted one so bad. Can you imagine one night I was skyping with Amirul and I read through Snorlax Wikipedia and I cried. IT WAS JUST SO FAT AND CUTE. All it does is sleep, and the only time it wakes up is to eat. LIKE HOW DAMN ADORABLE?!! So out of my 3 eggs on the day of the Pokemon hunt, one was a 10km egg. My first and only one. When I was walking and my screen went “oh?” (I love that it does that it’s so cute) the egg hatched, into a…. You guessed it – SNORLAX!!! I screamed right in the middle of Pavi, with Amirul. Dancing and jumping. After that, the whole day I sang I got a Snorlax, yes I do. I got a Snorlax what about you ? Amirul would just reply, no I don’t. Hahahaha. But he was really happy for me.

 After catching Snorlax I’ve been ngehhhh bout catching anymore Pokemons. I do play still. But I just focus on my Snorlax. Used most of my Stardust to power it up. Because when I power up my baby, it jumps and then jiggles. Haihhhh I’m so happy. But I saw my sister caught a Lickitung ! It’s so funny looking I want it. Till my next Pokemon Go update, gotta catch them all! 


You can say I’m a soppy person. Definitely a soppy person – Overemotional could be a word to define me. I believe I learnt it from my sister.

 I can’t forget the time during raya, when we were all in our Baju kurung and eating kuih raya watching VMAs (YEARS AGO). Beyonce was performing, and then when she finished she drops her microphone and opens the button of her suit and rubs her baby bump. (Iconic moment I’m sure you guys know what I’m talking about.) My sister jumped out her seat and screamed and turned tomato red ! And bawled out in tears. I was like wtheck ??? I’ll never forget that event. That could be the most emotional my sister has been ever in her lifetime over such a little thing. She cried happy tears for Beyonce as if Queen B was her BESTFRIEND ! 

But now. I’m just like that. Ok, maybe not that level yet. But I cry, a lot. Not because of my problems or anything. But little things like that. I cry watching movies, and I’m not even ashamed of it anymore. I no longer hide it. *sobs and blows nose loudly in the cinema* I’m that girl. Don’t ever mention to Amirul the time he went to watch Love, Rosie with me. He asked me if I was okay so many times because of how much I was crying. Poor boy looked frightened. After that we never went to watch romantic movies in the cinema ever again. I learnt to watch it by myself, at home. ME BEFORE YOU I’M COMING FOR YOU. 

So, when Amirul bought me the book Soppy. (Which has been on my list for so damn long because it was out of stock in Kinokuniya for so long!) I cried.

 I literally screamed when I got the message. It was so unexpected. He told me he was going to go to the bank with Pizzo, I didn’t know the bank was near KLCC and I didn’t even think of him buying it for me. But man. Idk why but when he gives me books for some reason I cry… 

Basically, I do this thing where I actually send him emails and write him letters. When I want to remember a date or when I want to explain myself or what I’m feeling. One time, I sent him the comic strips from Soppy which I found on tumblr. Lots of it. And all I said was how cute is this. Then months later, I found out what book it was and told him about it. Didn’t expect him to get it for me.  #howdidigetsoblessed