My dad graduated ! He finally finished his PhD in International relations or something like that. His thesis was on bout globalisation something something. I know, great daughter I am. (Update I found out it’s about mordernisation and history something about nations and state. There’s no globalisation in the title even ! But I’m sure it’s about globalisation)
There was a quote once, I read – children do not learn by what you tell them, but by what you show them. And with my dad finally completing his PhD, I saw first hand determination and responsibility being displayed right before my eyes.
I remember my dad crouched infront of the computer with his piles of books – determined to write his thesis. He had a 4 year break from work to do it. Every day morning to night, he would highlight page after page with a pen that balanced behind his ear. I would look at him head hung from the bed of the master bedroom, with my legs up against the wall sighing “I’m bored.” Occasionally, he would bring me to 7Eleven for a quick treat. I would always grab Crunchie my favourite chocolate bar (I had one today and it tastes just like childhood). Then, back to the bed with Art Attack on while he continued highlighting and typing.
The 4 years weren’t enough though, he couldn’t solely focus on his thesis. He had to pick me up from school, which most of the time he’d lose track of time and I would wait with the guard till 7.30pm (school ends at 6pm). He had to take care of my brother and sister, picking them up and dropping them off to tuition and extra classes. Grocery shopping, lunch and dinner. My mom would be working late night during the time my dad was the house husband. So he didn’t complete it during the break he was given.
He put it on hold for a decade maybe. We even went to London, and came back and he worked in Malaysia again. I even forgot my dad did such thing – PhD? What’s that? However, after a few years had passed the university called him up asking him to complete it. And he did – adding more years of effort into editing and mending his thesis. I asked him “why do you bother? After all those years.” He answered, “it’s my responsibility as a student, and as a man to finish what I’ve started.” – responsibility.
My mother was there every step of the way. She worked while he took his break for extra income, she pushed him when he needed the motivation, she even locked him up in the bed room alone to have him read and do his thesis. Helping him type up his amendments, reviewing his references, keeping updated with his deadline and in check with his schedule. What is a man without his woman right?
Today was the day, the long awaited day – 16 years to be exact. The road officially came to an end, and he has his PhD in Social Science or IR or something HAHA WE WILL NEVER KNOW. But what ever it is, we are proud of him. All of us, even little Miqi. Even though we (my mom, my sister and I) slept through the speeches in the morning, we were wide awake for when Ayah was on stage. Proud of you, Ayah ❤️